Date: 7/16/2003 11:57:39 AM
Name or Pseudonym: Francis
Subject: Temper and Perserverence
I often times find that being a single man is difficult and often I am lonely and plagued by anger and shame for the past two years. I get angry when I am rejected by women or when another woman wants to just be friends. I ask God to fogive me for being angry when I am rejected. Acting out can be a way of getting even but Christ taught us not to seek our own justice. Let go and let god I tell myself. However, often I am still very hurt and angry and short tempered with my friends and strangers. I pray for forgiveness every day and for the motivation to control my emotions and not to lash out at those around me. Like when a woman shakes my hand during Sunday Mass after the Lords prayer in a haughty or distasteful way instead of smilling and saying "peace be with you". I try to remember the numerous relationships Ive had with lovely and caring people and the many people that love me. But I often get upset at that moment. I remind myself later that such people are not judging me by my generosity to the poor or my goodness or my soul but by what they see on the outside. I know that God cares only about whats on the inside. And so I pray for strength to love myself and work through my pain. However, I also pray for forgiveness for being upset, short tempered and for behaving inappropriately at such times.