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Joseph McAleer
Source: Catholic News Service

"Splice" (Warner Bros.) is an unintentionally amusing and not-very-scary horror film which reminds us, once again, that it's not nice to fool with Mother Nature. Though its message is ambiguous, this perverse tale of genetic engineering run amok ought to win new converts to the Catholic Church's repeated warnings that scientists should not "play God" when it comes to human cloning and procreation.

Clive (Adrien Brody) and Elsa (Sarah Polley) are partners in life and in the lab. Genetic engineers at Nucleic Exchange Research and Development (NERD for short), they specialize in "splicing" together genes from different animal species to create new life forms. Their pride and joy are "Fred" and "Ginger," bulbous blobs that may contain a new protein that will "cure" countless diseases, from Parkinson's to cancer.

Motivated by greed as a result of their partnership with wicked pharmaceutical companies, NERD's owners are delighted with these "designer species." Clive and Elsa are ready for the next step—human gene splicing—to achieve "the medical breakthrough of the century," but NERD says no, citing the "moral outrage" that would ensue.

Viewers looking for moral clarity on a timely issue will find none in "Splice," which instead waffles. "If God did not want us to explore his domain, why did he give us the map?" one scientist says. Clive is conflicted; while he admits "we changed the rules," he declares, "There are some things you just don't do!"

Elsa agrees that "human cloning is illegal," but adds, speaking of their proposed creation, "This won't be human, entirely." She, too, cites "moral considerations," saying, "People are dying now who we can give hope to."

In fact, a lot of people (including human embryos) die in "Splice," thanks to what happens once Elsa persuades Clive to proceed with the experiment. The human hybrid result, "H-50," is initially monstrous, resembling an albino guinea pig on steroids. But soon this creature (which only consumes Tic Tacs—not a good sign) morphs into the comely Dren (Delphine Chaneac). The bride of Frankenstein never looked this good, apart from chicken legs, retractable wings and a rather deadly tail.

Dren grows up at an accelerated rate, and the inevitable mother-daughter conflicts ensue, especially when the adolescent Dren, high on hormones, turns her attentions to Clive.

No wonder Clive's hard heart melts and he is now attracted to Dren—Elsa used her own genes in Dren's creation. When Clive puts on the swing music and he and Dren dance their own version of Fred and Ginger, "Splice" takes a farcical turn. What follows is outrageous and often obscene, as the four credited scriptwriters display an unhealthy obsession with human-monster copulation.

"Splice" does not wholly condemn the process or method, only the misguided result. The Catholic Church, by contrast, is unwavering on the evils of manipulating procreation by any method that involves the destruction of innocent human life or a separation of the essential unitive and procreative aspects of marital love.

The film contains a generally sympathetic presentation of human cloning, genetic engineering, and embryo destruction; nudity; nonmarital sexual activity; rape; rough language; and bloody scenes of violence and torture. The Catholic News Service classification is O—morally offensive. The Motion Picture Association of America rating is R—restricted. Under 17 requires accompanying parent or adult guardian.

Joseph McAleer is a guest reviewer for Catholic News Service.

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Andrew: Andrew was St. Peter’s brother, and was called with him. "As [Jesus] was walking by the sea of Galilee, he saw two brothers, Simon who is now called Peter, and his brother Andrew, casting a net into the sea; they were fishermen. He said to them, ‘Come after me, and I will make you fishers of men.’ At once they left their nets and followed him" (Matthew 4:18-20). 
<p>John the Evangelist presents Andrew as a disciple of John the Baptist. When Jesus walked by one day, John said, "Behold, the Lamb of God." Andrew and another disciple followed Jesus. "Jesus turned and saw them following him and said to them, ‘What are you looking for?’ They said to him, ‘Rabbi (which translated means Teacher), where are you staying?’ He said to them, ‘Come, and you will see.’ So they went and saw where he was staying, and they stayed with him that day" (John 1:38-39a). </p><p>Little else is said about Andrew in the Gospels. Before the multiplication of the loaves, it was Andrew who spoke up about the boy who had the barley loaves and fishes (see John 6:8-9). When the Gentiles went to see Jesus, they came to Philip, but Philip then had recourse to Andrew (see John 12:20-22). </p><p>Legend has it that Andrew preached the Good News in what is now modern Greece and Turkey and was crucified at Patras.</p> American Catholic Blog We look ahead to the coming of the Son of Man, standing erect and with heads held high. We live in hope, not in fear. Our experience of God is no longer limited by human weakness or even human sinfulness. God has always been one step ahead of us, with a plan that exceeds our greatest desires.


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