March 10, 2010
Lent and Forgiveness
by Friar Jim Van Vurst, O.F.M.
Lent presents to us God’s infinite love for all humankind. So many teachings in the gospel emphasize the mercy of God, which is surely one of the reasons the Gospels are constantly read.
tire of the Parable of the Prodigal Son, our Gospel for the fourth Sunday of Lent (Lk 15:1-32). The scene is so easy to picture in our minds. The son has taken off on his own, expecting
to set the world on fire, and in the end he is the one who gets burned. He has
dishonored his father in a most horrific way. By taking his share of the
inheritance before his father dies, he has in so many words said to his father,
“As far as I’m concerned, you’re dead now. I want out.”
Yet, Jesus described
the father’s longing to see his son again, sitting by the road day after day. When the son finally came to his senses and journeyed home, the
father's heart leaped for joy. He doesn’t force his
prodigal to crawl to him on his knees. Rather, the father runs down the hill to
reach his son without delay.
the son is already practicing his apology, asking only that he be given the
lowly status of a servant. The father not only welcomes him back without
recrimination, but he embraces him and calls for a marvelous feast.
Many listeners were not pleased with this parable of Jesus.
Likewise even today some are not happy. They say the father was too kind. Where was the justice, the penalty, the
“payback"? The father left that bad son “off the hook.” That is why only
Jesus could tell that parable; no one else but he would have thought that way.
God is always doing the opposite of what many think he should do. If we are wise, all of us would relish this mercy of God, illustrated in
Jesus’ parable. We have all experienced God’s mercy and always will need
this parable was spoken by Jesus because he wanted his listeners and in
particular his disciples to take to heart. When it comes to sin, we are the
prodigal son or daughter. When it comes to forgiveness, we are to be like the
prodigal’s father (or mother).
What Forgiveness Is and Is Not
need to understand what forgiveness really is. And let’s face it. Forgiving
real hurt is more difficult than fasting, doing other penances or going to
Church and saying our prayers.
It is extremely important to realize
just where forgiveness resides. To begin with, forgiveness is not a feeling or
an emotion; it is a decision we make even when our feelings are charged with
Forgiveness comes from our will. We may feel like we don’t mean the
forgiveness we try offer. We easily judge ourselves by our feelings rather than
by the decisions we make. But if we say the words, “I forgive” and pray for
that offender, we do indeed forgive. To forgive often includes an act of faith
in trusting we mean what we say.
forgiveness is not given on condition that the person apologizes. Our
forgiveness may be rejected. We don’t
forgive in order to get something back. It may or may not happen. It is given because
it is the good and the right thing to do; it is what Jesus asked us to do: “Forgive one another."
Forgiveness is taking a risk of being hurt
again. At the same time, forgiveness includes accepting an apology if and when
it is given. Don’t be surprised if some feelings of hurt, even resentment, may
linger after forgiveness. That struggle is part of our woundedness. Forgiveness is choosing to love another who by rights doesn’t seem to
deserve it. Remember, forgiveness is about compassion rather than justice.
saying all this, it’s no wonder that our willingness to forgive is the most
perfect way of thanking God for the forgiveness we have experienced in our own
love. God’s mercy is not to be hoarded by us; it is to be shared.
But Jesus Was God
Yes, Jesus was God, so we might say it was “easy” for him to
forgive. The truth is that he experienced life on earth through his human
nature. He gave up, as Paul tells us, “what it was like to feel like God.” On the cross, his whole body was filled with
terrible pain. He felt rejected and hated. Forgiveness at that moment was as
much an act of Jesus' will as it is for us. Yet, in the midst of all that, he forgave those
who were murdering him.
But, a most important
point: God shares his mercy and forgiveness with us that we may share it with
others. In the most difficult forgiving situations, Jesus tells us: “Come to
me, you who are burdened….”All our forgiveness is from the font of God’s love for us. He would never
command us to forgive and not give us, if we ask in faith and trust, the grace
and strength to forgive.
Readers respond to Friar Jack Wintz's February E-spiration, Musing: The Way of the Cross
Dear Annette and Jim: I’m happy my meditations were able to support and strengthen you as you walk
in the footsteps of Christ. My prayers also go out on behalf of all my readers as
you continue to accept our Savior’s challenge this Lent. Friar Jack
Dear Ruth: There
is more than one way to get a copy of this “Way of the Cross.” First, you may
simply go back to the archives of Friar Jack and print out Friar Jack’s E-spirations of February 24, 2010. For a longer
version of this Way of the Cross, you can call customer service
(1-800-488-0488) at St. Anthony Messenger Press and ask for the Catholic Update Way of the Cross by
Father Jack Wintz in pamphlet form for $1.95 each, plus shipping (bulk prices
available). Thanks for your interest. Friar
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