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March Madness and Marriage Moments
By Mary Carty
Source: AmericanCatholic.org
Published: Friday, March 11, 2011
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After a season that encompassed autumn, a multitude of games, the holidays, a new year, exams, the last days of winter and regionals, college basketball teams are now waiting to learn which teams will make the cut for the 2011 NCAA Division I Men’s Basketball tournament.

On Sunday, March 13, at 6 p.m. (ET), the 68 “finalist” teams will be announced. These teams will have earned their way to this prestigious tournament that will test their well-honed skills to try to bring home the coveted DI title.

The schools, players and fans may be overjoyed, but the world of business is less than enthusiastic.

Earlier this month, Challenger, Gray & Christmas, Inc., reported that this sporting event could cost American companies $190 million in lost-worker productivity due to the distraction of computers, cell phones, office pools and tournament chit chat.

Though business stands to lose millions, stakes are high as well on the home courts all over this land, as marriages may suffer losses as well.

In some households, this annual event, known as “March Madness,” may cause minor or even major frustrations in a marriage. The degree of interest in the tournament may range from occasionally checking on scores during the tournament to watching the games to a 24/7 obsession that includes incessant up-to-the-minute radio, television and Web commentaries before, after and during each of the seven rounds. All of this outside focus may cause some distraction in the relationship.

Hands down, until April 4 and the sound of the final buzzer, “March Madness” will be the buzz—here, there and just about everywhere.

For a non-sports-minded spouse, this hoopla remains a mystery.

Like, how could the finals of anything possibly have 68 teams?

A neglected spouse may wonder why so much time and energy is spent on this spectator sport and wish that the same enthusiasm shown during this event would be shown at home.

For those baffled by this phenomenon, maybe taking a fresh look at the situation could bring about a change of attitude and a better understanding of the event.

Considering that “March Madness” is so popular that it is woven into the fabric of our culture, there must be some positive attributes that cause millions of fans to follow the teams though the regular season and become even bigger fans during the weeks of the tournament.

There must be some lessons to learn and there is the possibility of discovering some common ground for the couple to share.

Though this tournament is a competition for the trophy, title and glory, it is also a celebration and acknowledgment of the work and commitment of all of the student athletes and all of the teams shown over the course of the season.

A closer look at the process of the tournament and the game itself demonstrates some of the basics that brought these teams to the highest level of their leagues and to the college basketball world are:

1. There is a general protocol – rules and guidelines – understood and carried out by all participants.
2. At their best, there is clear, concise verbal and nonverbal communication between team members.
3. There is a strong spirit of commitment.
4. There are strategies to work together as a team to get the job done.
5. There is scheduled time shared on a regular basis to strengthen the team.
6. There is a united effort toward a goal and/or goals.
7. From opening tip-off to the final buzzer, the team members usually show hope, faith and strength.
8. There is perseverance of all members of the team while sharing the workload.
9. In time of crisis, time outs are called.
10. Last, but not least, teams often pray together before the beginning of a game.

Aha, there is common ground.

How ironic! All 10 concepts that create successful teamwork on the basketball court are the same principles that can help build a strong marriage.

This new discovery and paradigm shift for the non-sportive spouse might make watching this sporting event a pleasure, knowing that there is much more to be aware of than the score.

Hats off to the 68 college teams that made it to the NCAA Division I Men’s Basketball tournament.

For fans and non-fans alike, taking time to watch any of the games will be an opportunity share in the accomplishments of these fine athletes and learn a lesson or two about successful teamwork on the home court.


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Anthony Claret: The "spiritual father of Cuba" was a missionary, religious founder, social reformer, queen’s chaplain, writer and publisher, archbishop and refugee. He was a Spaniard whose work took him to the Canary Islands, Cuba, Madrid, Paris and to the First Vatican Council. 
<p>In his spare time as weaver and designer in the textile mills of Barcelona, he learned Latin and printing: The future priest and publisher was preparing. Ordained at 28, he was prevented by ill health from entering religious life as a Carthusian or as a Jesuit, but went on to become one of Spain’s most popular preachers. </p><p>He spent 10 years giving popular missions and retreats, always placing great emphasis on the Eucharist and devotion to the Immaculate Heart of Mary. Her rosary, it was said, was never out of his hand. At 42, beginning with five young priests, he founded a religious institute of missionaries, known today as the Claretians. </p><p>He was appointed to head the much-neglected archdiocese of Santiago in Cuba. He began its reform by almost ceaseless preaching and hearing of confessions, and suffered bitter opposition mainly for opposing concubinage and giving instruction to black slaves. A hired assassin (whose release from prison Anthony had obtained) slashed open his face and wrist. Anthony succeeded in getting the would-be assassin’s death sentence commuted to a prison term. His solution for the misery of Cubans was family-owned farms producing a variety of foods for the family’s own needs and for the market. This invited the enmity of the vested interests who wanted everyone to work on a single cash crop—sugar. Besides all his religious writings are two books he wrote in Cuba: <i>Reflections on Agriculture</i> and <i>Country Delights</i>. </p><p>He was recalled to Spain for a job he did not relish—being chaplain for the queen. He went on three conditions: He would reside away from the palace, he would come only to hear the queen’s confession and instruct the children and he would be exempt from court functions. In the revolution of 1868, he fled with the queen’s party to Paris, where he preached to the Spanish colony. </p><p>All his life Anthony was interested in the Catholic press. He founded the Religious Publishing House, a major Catholic publishing venture in Spain, and wrote or published 200 books and pamphlets. </p><p>At Vatican I, where he was a staunch defender of the doctrine of infallibility, he won the admiration of his fellow bishops. Cardinal Gibbons of Baltimore remarked of him, "There goes a true saint." At the age of 63, he died in exile near the border of Spain.</p> American Catholic Blog The greatest tragedy of our world is that men do not know, really know, that God loves them. Some believe it in a shadowy sort of way. If they were to really think about it they would soon realize that their belief in God’s love for them is very remote and abstract. Because of this lack of realization of God’s love for them, men do not know how to love God back. —Catherine de Hueck Doherty

 
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