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March Madness and Marriage Moments
By Mary Carty
Source: AmericanCatholic.org
Published: Friday, March 11, 2011
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After a season that encompassed autumn, a multitude of games, the holidays, a new year, exams, the last days of winter and regionals, college basketball teams are now waiting to learn which teams will make the cut for the 2011 NCAA Division I Men’s Basketball tournament.

On Sunday, March 13, at 6 p.m. (ET), the 68 “finalist” teams will be announced. These teams will have earned their way to this prestigious tournament that will test their well-honed skills to try to bring home the coveted DI title.

The schools, players and fans may be overjoyed, but the world of business is less than enthusiastic.

Earlier this month, Challenger, Gray & Christmas, Inc., reported that this sporting event could cost American companies $190 million in lost-worker productivity due to the distraction of computers, cell phones, office pools and tournament chit chat.

Though business stands to lose millions, stakes are high as well on the home courts all over this land, as marriages may suffer losses as well.

In some households, this annual event, known as “March Madness,” may cause minor or even major frustrations in a marriage. The degree of interest in the tournament may range from occasionally checking on scores during the tournament to watching the games to a 24/7 obsession that includes incessant up-to-the-minute radio, television and Web commentaries before, after and during each of the seven rounds. All of this outside focus may cause some distraction in the relationship.

Hands down, until April 4 and the sound of the final buzzer, “March Madness” will be the buzz—here, there and just about everywhere.

For a non-sports-minded spouse, this hoopla remains a mystery.

Like, how could the finals of anything possibly have 68 teams?

A neglected spouse may wonder why so much time and energy is spent on this spectator sport and wish that the same enthusiasm shown during this event would be shown at home.

For those baffled by this phenomenon, maybe taking a fresh look at the situation could bring about a change of attitude and a better understanding of the event.

Considering that “March Madness” is so popular that it is woven into the fabric of our culture, there must be some positive attributes that cause millions of fans to follow the teams though the regular season and become even bigger fans during the weeks of the tournament.

There must be some lessons to learn and there is the possibility of discovering some common ground for the couple to share.

Though this tournament is a competition for the trophy, title and glory, it is also a celebration and acknowledgment of the work and commitment of all of the student athletes and all of the teams shown over the course of the season.

A closer look at the process of the tournament and the game itself demonstrates some of the basics that brought these teams to the highest level of their leagues and to the college basketball world are:

1. There is a general protocol – rules and guidelines – understood and carried out by all participants.
2. At their best, there is clear, concise verbal and nonverbal communication between team members.
3. There is a strong spirit of commitment.
4. There are strategies to work together as a team to get the job done.
5. There is scheduled time shared on a regular basis to strengthen the team.
6. There is a united effort toward a goal and/or goals.
7. From opening tip-off to the final buzzer, the team members usually show hope, faith and strength.
8. There is perseverance of all members of the team while sharing the workload.
9. In time of crisis, time outs are called.
10. Last, but not least, teams often pray together before the beginning of a game.

Aha, there is common ground.

How ironic! All 10 concepts that create successful teamwork on the basketball court are the same principles that can help build a strong marriage.

This new discovery and paradigm shift for the non-sportive spouse might make watching this sporting event a pleasure, knowing that there is much more to be aware of than the score.

Hats off to the 68 college teams that made it to the NCAA Division I Men’s Basketball tournament.

For fans and non-fans alike, taking time to watch any of the games will be an opportunity share in the accomplishments of these fine athletes and learn a lesson or two about successful teamwork on the home court.


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James: This James is the brother of John the Evangelist. The two were called by Jesus as they worked with their father in a fishing boat on the Sea of Galilee. Jesus had already called another pair of brothers from a similar occupation: Peter and Andrew. “He walked along a little farther and saw James, the son of Zebedee, and his brother John. They too were in a boat mending their nets. Then he called them. So they left their father Zebedee in the boat along with the hired men and followed him” (Mark 1:19-20). 
<p>James was one of the favored three who had the privilege of witnessing the Transfiguration, the raising to life of the daughter of Jairus and the agony in Gethsemani. </p><p>Two incidents in the Gospels describe the temperament of this man and his brother. St. Matthew tells that their mother came (Mark says it was the brothers themselves) to ask that they have the seats of honor (one on the right, one on the left of Jesus) in the kingdom. “Jesus said in reply, ‘You do not know what you are asking. Can you drink the cup that I am going to drink?’ They said to him, ‘We can’” (Matthew 20:22). Jesus then told them they would indeed drink the cup and share his baptism of pain and death, but that sitting at his right hand or left was not his to give—it “is for those for whom it has been prepared by my Father” (Matthew 20:23b). It remained to be seen how long it would take to realize the implications of their confident “We can!” </p><p>The other disciples became indignant at the ambition of James and John. Then Jesus taught them all the lesson of humble service: The purpose of authority is to serve. They are not to impose their will on others, or lord it over them. This is the position of Jesus himself. He was the servant of all; the service imposed on him was the supreme sacrifice of his own life. </p><p>On another occasion, James and John gave evidence that the nickname Jesus gave them—“sons of thunder”—was an apt one. The Samaritans would not welcome Jesus because he was on his way to hated Jerusalem. “When the disciples James and John saw this they asked, ‘Lord, do you want us to call down fire from heaven to consume them?’ Jesus turned and rebuked them...” (Luke 9:54-55). </p><p>James was apparently the first of the apostles to be martyred. “About that time King Herod laid hands upon some members of the church to harm them. He had James, the brother of John, killed by the sword, and when he saw that this was pleasing to the Jews he proceeded to arrest Peter also” (Acts 12:1-3a). </p><p>This James, sometimes called James the Greater, is not to be confused with James the Lesser (May 3) or with the author of the Letter of James and the leader of the Jerusalem community.</p> American Catholic Blog We don’t need so much to talk about God but to allow people to feel how God lives within us, that’s our work.

 
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